Renita
I always read these stories and was to afraid to tell mine but if it can help someone than that would be great. Mine started about 2 years ago. I was in another state when I started feeling ill, came back home and continued to not feel great,during all this I started losing weight, went to the hospital the first time they gave me some zithromax told me it was the flu, and home I went.
About 2 weeks later back again because now my chest was hurting and still was ill and still dropping a lot of weight. They told me ok were going to admit you and run some tests, give you a x-ray and then we will go from there so when the doctor that was handling my care in the hospital asked me are you hiv I said no, they assigned me an infectious disease doctor because they tought it was TB. Later that day the test results came back and the doctor came in (infectious disease doctor) he closed the door because they thought that I had TB I thought he was coming to tell me that it was TB. He said do you know that your cd4 is -25 I said what does that mean he said maam your hiv+. I laid in that hospital bed, and cried, and cried, and cried.
When my husband came in I had to tell him because I was confused hurt and scared about what I just was told. When I told him I though he was either gonna kill me or leave me but either way he had to be told. He never judged me I never judged him but they were all kinds of questions that I wanted to ask because we had just gone through this awful phase of our marriage where he was having little secrets behind my back dealing with other women we got that straightened out but there was still my hiv.
After a few days in there I Had found out that I had PCP, fluid around my lungs, a mass on my lungs, I went from a 287 to 200 lbs in about 3 months. I had a very hard time in the hospital, I was giving a chest tube the 1st one pigtailed it had to be taken out and redone then the next one worked just fine I started showing signs of improvement but when I went home that Friday that Monday I was right back in the hospital because when they took the chest tube out it ended up getting air in it and my lung collapsed, actually my lung collapsed about 2 times.
The 3rd week in the hospital was when it really took a toll on me I had a procedure done to me when they take the chest tube pieces out and shoot this fluid in the tube that's hanging out of your chest and they tried to adhere my lung to my rib cage and the doctor that did it told me that this probably will not help you he said that the condition that my body was in that I probably would not live 1 year I was so scared because when he did that procedure he left and I was stuck to deal with the awful pain that followed. The next day he came back to pat me on the shoulder and said that he wished me the best.
I thank God that he helped me through that period because I thought my life was over I have 3 kids and they are all negative (thank God) but it goes to show you that when you think everything is fine it can come at you at anytime. Just have faith and believe he will help you through because he can do all things and that's how I got thru it.
My hubby is fine he helps take care of me because I still have some good days and some bad. We told his mother and of course ladies she blamed me for giving it to her son and that's when all things came in the open when we told he we were at her house and she just started asking me what did do who did I commit adultery with and that's when my hubby came clean on some things that I never knew. Still I didn't give up on him he asked me for forgiveness I did it but I was a very hard task because while I was home taking care of the kids and cleaning washing clothes and cooking he was doing something else but it was done and over with and I couldn't bring it back. So we moved forward with our life we are both doing well he a lot better than me when I catch a cold I sometimes get really sick but I'm making it.
Ladies just because you are married doesn't mean anything I actually thought that I was safe and I was sick.
Thanks for listening
Veritee
Where to start? We are both in our late 50s. We are British, live in the UK, have been married for over 21 years, but have known each other for about 30 years We have been sexually faithful to each other for all those years and have one daughter who is now 18. We only have one child because I have difficulties conceiving.
Last week we never would have thought HIV would be in our lives - how wrong can you be?
But I now find I am HIV positive, so is my husband and my daughter may be - we will find out next week if she is too.
I had the test because my husband of 21 + years has been very ill and eventually had a HIV test that proved to be positive last Friday ! He had the test because he has been unwell for quite a while and over the last 4 months or more become very ill with weight loss infections etc and everything else to explain why he continued to have so many infections and was so unwell and thin, night sweets, fever etc had been tested for.
I eventually insisted on the HIV test last week as I was so worried I went with him to his doctor and demanded he was tested for HIV, although his doctor seemed to think it was unlikely - but it was the only thing I could think of that explained his symptoms and continuing ill health.
HIV is comparatively rare in the very rural part of the UK we live, especially amongst heterosexual people so this is why no one had considered this as a cause of my husbands illness - except me!! I thought it a very remote possibility because he has worked for many years in various places in Africa and South America etc as a marine engineer. And it seems I was right as he is HIV positive!!!!!!!
He got these earth shattering results on Friday 18th January 2008. We were both in total shock - still are!
But it got much worse for us on Wednesday my husband was admitted to hospital, he is still there and is very ill as his HIV and opportunistic infections has gone untreated for a long time and he now has PCP pneumonia as well as other difficulties. Then on Thursday I was told I was HIV positive too. Thankfully I am still well. I have the CD4 and viral load tests next Wednesday, so I do not know my state of health yet, but I do currently feel reasonably well except for hot and cold flushes and a few other minor problems.
My husband is a seaman working at sea for more than 26 years in countries like Africa and south America, Thailand etc. He is away from home at least 7 months of every year in about 2 to 3 month blocks.
He is heterosexual - with no doubt that he is not - has never used any intravenous drugs and says he has not has sex 'ever' with any women (or men) while away at sea, or with anyone but me since we got together many, many years ago. I believe him as sex has never been his priority but I am a realist so it could have happened, but I do believe him when he says it did not as he someone who NEVER takes any risks.
He has had small procedures - dentistry, a drip in Caracas, Venezuela for an allergic rash , stitches - at local medical facilities i.e Malabo, Nigeria, Brazil, Thailand, over the years where his HIV infection could have happened - he could only have got HIV from theses medical procedures!
It really does not bother me how he got it, in terms of apportioning blame - I do not blame him whatever way he got HIV.
Right now I have a husband seriously ill in hospital - he will not be home for some time - and a few days ago we did not even know either of us had HIV.
So it is really great to find stories from other women here - thank you all so much for sharing your stories.
I have read all the stories on here and my heart goes out to those mothers with such young children. Our child is 18 years old and of course will be able to look after herself if we are ill, so my situation does not compare to those of you with young children, I am just so sorry and hurt for you all.
We do not know as yet if she is also HIV positive! We are told it is 50/50 whether she is. She has a test on Wednesday.
For myself as her mother the worst thing would be if she is positive too.
Veritee
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