Stephy
Hi, im Stephy, 28yrs from NIgeria. i guess the saying goes "it happens even to the most carfull people" its actually true. if any one told me i could get inffected with HIV, i'll argue with the person endlessly but it so happend that i was tested HIV+ afterall in October 16th 2007. despite all the safety measures, never have sex without condom, no oral sex, always careful when kissing and never kissed when i or my guy had a bruise on the mouth, made sure i took all the preventive measure to avoid being HIV+ yet i was tested positve (that's a bomb for me) i never bargained for that. just one careless mistake, had sex without protection and i was tested HIV+tive.
I fell very ill for like 2months with prolonged daheorea i lost a lot of weight when i decided to go for HIV test and was found positive it knocked me off my feet but i had to be strong i demanded for a second test and a third confirmation test because i didnt believe the first test and was confirmed HIV+tive. i took a long walk to where only heavens knew because i was out of this world then, i thought all was gone my life future and plans all drained (all thanks to my guy). i cried for several hours i got more ill and didnt want to disclose the news to anyone. i felt like just dying at that moment and asked a lot of questions; why me? how did it happen? what would become of me? for how long do i have to live?
my guy got me infected he confessed to me that he's positive (after a great deal of confrontation) he told me he was tested positive 4months ago but didnt know how to tell me less he losses me by the time he discloses his HIV status to me so he decided to keep to himself and find an appropriate day and time to tell me of his status when the time is right. that never helped but rather resulted neagtively because i felt so hurt and cheated. as if it wasnt enough he later broke the ralationship with me and left the town to where i never knew. up till date i've not heard from him his number stop going through anytime i tried to call him, his e-mail address wasnt active any more. im so hurt and lonely he reaped me of my future and abscounded in the thin air.
my whole life is devastated untill i choose to tell my tell my sister whom i confide in she encouraged me and gave me support, she took me to a clinic where i got medication and counseling i still havent gotten over the trauma. i at times isolate myself from people even my brothers and sisters, i cry my head off, asking questions that i dont seem to have any answers for. im yet to tell my brothers and sisters with the fear of stigmatization and rejection. my whole world is crumbling down, i need some one whom i can share exeriences with a friend i can confide in someone who'll take me as i am, am so scared of the world.
all i want to do now is try to retrieve my steps, get myself together and move on if life worth living positively.
i hope a lot of young girls like me would learn a lesson from my mistake "just once and got infected" so never you trust any one not for once not even your self kos you might be carried away and do something wrongly and before you realiase it it's irreversable so becareful always.
Thank you.
Renita
I always read these stories and was to afraid to tell mine but if it can help someone than that would be great. Mine started about 2 years ago. I was in another state when I started feeling ill, came back home and continued to not feel great,during all this I started losing weight, went to the hospital the first time they gave me some zithromax told me it was the flu, and home I went.
About 2 weeks later back again because now my chest was hurting and still was ill and still dropping a lot of weight. They told me ok were going to admit you and run some tests, give you a x-ray and then we will go from there so when the doctor that was handling my care in the hospital asked me are you hiv I said no, they assigned me an infectious disease doctor because they tought it was TB. Later that day the test results came back and the doctor came in (infectious disease doctor) he closed the door because they thought that I had TB I thought he was coming to tell me that it was TB. He said do you know that your cd4 is -25 I said what does that mean he said maam your hiv+. I laid in that hospital bed, and cried, and cried, and cried.
When my husband came in I had to tell him because I was confused hurt and scared about what I just was told. When I told him I though he was either gonna kill me or leave me but either way he had to be told. He never judged me I never judged him but they were all kinds of questions that I wanted to ask because we had just gone through this awful phase of our marriage where he was having little secrets behind my back dealing with other women we got that straightened out but there was still my hiv.
After a few days in there I Had found out that I had PCP, fluid around my lungs, a mass on my lungs, I went from a 287 to 200 lbs in about 3 months. I had a very hard time in the hospital, I was giving a chest tube the 1st one pigtailed it had to be taken out and redone then the next one worked just fine I started showing signs of improvement but when I went home that Friday that Monday I was right back in the hospital because when they took the chest tube out it ended up getting air in it and my lung collapsed, actually my lung collapsed about 2 times.
The 3rd week in the hospital was when it really took a toll on me I had a procedure done to me when they take the chest tube pieces out and shoot this fluid in the tube that's hanging out of your chest and they tried to adhere my lung to my rib cage and the doctor that did it told me that this probably will not help you he said that the condition that my body was in that I probably would not live 1 year I was so scared because when he did that procedure he left and I was stuck to deal with the awful pain that followed. The next day he came back to pat me on the shoulder and said that he wished me the best.
I thank God that he helped me through that period because I thought my life was over I have 3 kids and they are all negative (thank God) but it goes to show you that when you think everything is fine it can come at you at anytime. Just have faith and believe he will help you through because he can do all things and that's how I got thru it.
My hubby is fine he helps take care of me because I still have some good days and some bad. We told his mother and of course ladies she blamed me for giving it to her son and that's when all things came in the open when we told he we were at her house and she just started asking me what did do who did I commit adultery with and that's when my hubby came clean on some things that I never knew. Still I didn't give up on him he asked me for forgiveness I did it but I was a very hard task because while I was home taking care of the kids and cleaning washing clothes and cooking he was doing something else but it was done and over with and I couldn't bring it back. So we moved forward with our life we are both doing well he a lot better than me when I catch a cold I sometimes get really sick but I'm making it.
Ladies just because you are married doesn't mean anything I actually thought that I was safe and I was sick.
Thanks for listening
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