AIDS in the Family - Part - 11-Apr-2008

Don't give up hope

Russ

My partner and best friend of the last 10 years died May 19, 2006 at the age of 47. He was about 27 years old when he was diagnosed with HIV. I have to make this announcement because I want people to know how courageous he was, how he lived for almost half his life with the stigma of HIV, with copious medications and all their complications and side-effects, sometimes with the unkind judgment of small minds, with the ever present prospect of illness and death.

He was courageous because he refused to be defined or defeated by a diagnosis. He was courageous because he insisted on life. He was vital, honest, passionate, loving, funny, angry, opinionated, impulsive, articulate, compassionate, charming and damned good looking. It's how he lived his life. He was a wonderfully strong person, whom I was glad and proud to have in my life.

So, please, live your life, don't quit, if not for yourself, for those who love you. My partner and friend left me with a lifetime gift and treasure........his spirit which I felt leave his body as he died peacefully by my side.

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April

Hello, My name is April, I am a Sister to a wonderful man that I have recently lost from HIV/AIDS. I am still struggling with the fact that something so cruel took his life. I miss and think about him every day. My family and I watched him live his life to the fullest and love the hardest a person possible could. He faced it head on and told it he was going on his terms not it's terms. He had so much courage and he was so brave.

I remember my sister telling me he sent her a card with the meaning of courage on it. She had said that fighting in IRAQ was not courage but staring death in the face and saying my terms, that is courage that is what courage is all about.

When he started going in and out of the hospital we knew it would not be long before it clamed his life. He was with us for thanksgiving and Christmas of 05' and passed in February of 06'. He was only 40. At least we had those last holidays together.

It's hard to see someone you love dearly slowly die and you can do nothing but pray that he goes quickly and not suffer. He looked so fragile in his bed and so helpless all I could do was tell him how much I loved him and that his 2 year old nephew would know him because he lives in all our hearts and he would never be forgotten. He had called me on the phone a week before he passed and told me my son would never know him he started crying and I told him not to say that because he was going to out live me. I know I have an angel watching over me and that's what keeps me going and I know he is in good company.

TO ALL WHO READ THIS, BE SAFE TO MY ANGEL, I LOVE YOU JORDAN!!!!!

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Shana

Hi! All My name is Shana I'm 21 and I'm a proud mother of a 2yr old son Shane. I recently Just lost my distant father from HIV. I'm still dealing with it and the fact that he may have infected someone else and not told them. I almost feel gulity because I feel as if I should seek out everyone I think he was with and tell them to go and get themselves checked out. Though I'm not the one carrying HIV I carry the burden of it and the humilty of my church going, straight and narrow 42yr old father coming up dead after everyone only knowing that he was sick maybe less than a month. I feel like he was a phony and should have been true to himself. In reading this page I give a lot of you credit for admitting to the way of style you like to live along with your preference for your sexual partner. In conjunction my stomach gets sick at those who openly admit to having sex with people and not letting them know you were positive how unresponsible. I may not have the disease but I'm not even one step away from it and seeing how it destroys people. I found out my dad was infected October 17,2005. By October 27th he was in the hospital cause he couldn't even walk by himself and fell face first in our garage in which two days prior to I caught him out there with one shoe on and one shoe off couldn't even pull his sock up onto his leg, told him not to be out there. On November 3rd he was taken to a nursing him where he couldn't walk, talk , nor even watch you walk from one side of the room to the other. November 10th I arrived at the for a midnight visit stayed for about 45 to 50 minutes not like he slept with his eyes closed he was ready for heaven. I continuely told him I was going to be OK I think now boy was I lieing. I left the nursing home and get home around 2:50 A.M. I received a call I was then told that my dad passed away I was thinking I just left him. Death is no joke and HIV will result from it. True some people tell me well gotta die of something at sometime but it's just so hard not to factor it in that "damn maybe if he woulda a been just a little more careful". After he died I was some of what surpriseingly OK cause I knew it was coming, but reality bit me in the ass once more. Though the nurses hasn't said anything and no one else really said too much about it I received a copy of his death certificate and damn right before lay those three letters that have changed my life forever
Death Certificate:
Cause of death- H I V

nothing is sugar coated on there. Everyone be safe and be honest life is precious and is not promised the least we could do is be grateful people and protect our temples as such beautiful creatures that god made us out to be.